Category: Toxic religion recovery

  • The Ground Beneath My Feet

    All I’d ever done was pretend—first in the family that raised me, then in the church. I didn’t even know I was pretending. Then I finally faced the truth, and people were talking about me. What followed was almost a decade of wandering. But what I’ve found in peer support groups isn’t another savior—it’s shared…

  • Breaking Down the Barriers to Love

    “I spent almost half a decade looking into the mirror and seeing someone else. Who did I see? Someone who everyone else expected me to be. People-pleasing doesn’t give your true self the opportunity to be loved—and it doesn’t give someone else the opportunity to be loved by your true self.”

  • Navigating the Cracks

    I’ve been trying to understand what I’m feeling when I look at social media these days. Confusion, fear, anger, and so much grief over where we are as a country right now. It feels like walking across a frozen pond with cracks, wondering when we might fall through. But I’m learning that beneath the surface…

  • When the Shell Cracks: Finding Truth Beyond Religious Performance

    Truth always finds a way to surface. Our ego tries to keep everything together, but eventually the shell cracks and what’s inside starts leaking out. If we’re brave enough to look at what seeps out instead of frantically patching the holes, we might find what we’ve been searching for all along.

  • The Stories We Tell Ourselves: Finding Truth Beyond Collective Narratives

    We tell ourselves stories in order to live,” Joan Didion wrote. But what happens when those shared stories—our collective narratives—become barriers to the very connection they promise to create? Growing up with parents whose lives were like apple carts filled to capacity, I learned early how fragile our shared stories can be. One uncomfortable truth…

  • When Authority Becomes the Enemy of Truth

    “Blind belief in authority is the greatest enemy of truth.” — Albert EinsteinThe ambulance lights cut through the darkness at the convenience store. Someone had played Russian roulette and lost. As I drove past that night, seventeen and heartbroken after my boyfriend left me for my best friend, I looked up at the empty sky…

  • You’re Not Crazy: Psychology Finally Recognizes Religious Trauma

    “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson For years, those of us who walked away from toxic religion were told we just had a ‘bad church experience’—but a groundbreaking American Psychological Association article is finally validating what we’ve known…

  • Finding My Way Back to Myself

    Why did I so readily follow a dangerous man wherever he went? Why did it all feel like the right thing to do? Looking back on my time in church, I’m still trying to understand what made me believe a rigid belief system and a broken pastor could fill the gaps in my life. The…

  • When Breaking Apart Sets You Free

    Autonomy isn’t selfish—it’s about staying true to yourself, no matter what others say you “should” be. How often do people tell you who to be or what to believe? Sometimes they push so hard because they’re unsure of themselves and need you to mirror their choices to feel comfortable. When we abandon ourselves to become…